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Heineken Light

by Staff | 2006.05.26

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Drinking light beer is silly and heretical and repulsive. It smacks of sacrifice. Pleasure should rarely be knifed on the altar of vanity, especially when the variables are beer and calories, not sweatpants and funerals. In general, light beer is something that seems to go well with families and discussions about Reginald in Accounts Payable. Sure, Amstel Light is a fine drink and Miller Lite has its nifty cachet, but the latter is about affordability, not waistline concerns. With that disclaimer imparted thusly, Heineken Premium Light isn’t terrible. It’s actually decent. Unlike Beck's Light, a gristly concoction unfit for pouring on the graves of dead dogs, Heineken’s new beverage doesn’t taunt you for your act of self-restraint. It’s a little thinner than the original (both in taste and bottle shape), but pleasantly drinkable. We’re still ashamed to buy it from anyone except the Puerto Rican guy in the bodega on Lafayette and S. Portland who didn’t seem to hand back our change with mocking and disdainful eyes.

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